Y'all I can't seem to find the clips I need so here's another transcript:
Ross: Hey-hey, since you’re the ‘fix-it’ lady, here’s a pickle, what do you do when the bride says she doesn’t want to have the wedding at all? Monica: She said that?! Ross: Yeah. Monica: Why?! Ross: I don’t know, I told her it was stupid to put off the wedding just because the hall was gone and she liked flipped out. Monica: Oh my God. You’re even dumber than I am! Ross: Excuse me? Monica: Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding? Ross: I don’t know. A month? Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. That’s what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, with the perfect four-tiered wedding cake (Starting to cry), with the little people on top. (Ross gets thrown a box of Kleenex from the bathroom and he gives her one.) Thanks. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was. Ross: I had no idea. And that-that pillowcase thing, I thought you guys were just doing the flying nun. Monica: Sometimes we were. Ross: Come on. You gotta help me figure out what to do. Okay? Monica: Okay. So this scene made me think of a little Gayle Rubin. Ross is upset at Monica for telling Emily to postpone the wedding as her dream ceremony location was starting to be torn down. Monica then convinces him that he's being an ass by dismissing the location as not a valid reason to postpone the wedding. We all know I hate Ross, but I also can't side with Monica here. In "The Traffic in Women", Rubin argues that in Marriage women are used as a commodity to build sustaining relationships between different families. When we talked about it in my Women's Studies 330 class we talked about how to get someone to play into their oppression you have to convince them that they benefit from their oppression, thus convincing women they want to have these lavish weddings. All of this is pretty capitalist and gross, including Ross' initial reasons to not post-pone the wedding. All that said I still want a nice wedding (Reasons I'm a bad feminist #324), except mine is about making the cis-hets uncomfortable and celebrating queer love. Leave a comment below!
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